


Permanent Ink

by glamourtentia



Category: Carnalis
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-05-04
Packaged: 2018-06-03 03:21:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6594565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glamourtentia/pseuds/glamourtentia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seb is an asshole, Joel is a dick, and THEY WILL KISS.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is based on characters from the Carnalis novella series, which you can read for free here if you haven't already!  
> http://www.arcsismedia.com/carnalis  
> They're super good and short and this fic is gonna be amazing but only if you've read them!

Joel scowled at the long line ahead of him, letting the coffee shop door swing shut behind him. _Just my luck._ He was already running a little late, having overslept after staying up most of the night, and this line wasn’t going to do him any favors, but he needed the caffeine too badly to consider leaving.

He rubbed at his tired eyes and sighed. At least he finally got some down time while he waited in the line, and he let himself zone out, shuffling along automatically as the line inched forward.

After a while, someone cleared their throat in front of him, and Joel was startled to realize he was at the front of the line. The barista was staring at him expectantly from behind large black-rimmed glasses. “What can I get for you?” he asked with the forced politeness unique to food service workers, tapping the end of his Sharpie on the counter.

“Um. A grande...” _Fuck._ Joel hadn’t bothered looking at the menu to decide what he wanted, so he glanced up at it and read off the first thing his eyes landed on. “Caramelized honey latte,” he said quickly. The barista raised an eyebrow, and Joel flushed a bit. “What?” he demanded defensively.

“Nothing.” The barista looked down and grabbed a cup, pulling the cap off his Sharpie with his teeth. “Good drink. What name should I call?” he asked around the Sharpie cap sticking out of his mouth, the marker tip hovering over the cup.

“Uhh...Joel,” Joel said slowly, a little distracted by the way the cap bobbed up and down as the barista chewed on it. He paid with exact change, sliding it forward on the counter without looking back up, and trundled off to the side to wait for his coffee.

After what felt like an hour, Joel thought he heard the barista call his name, but he wasn’t positive. He walked up anyway, just to check. “Did you call--”

“Yep,” the barista said, popping the P, as he pushed the drink towards Joel. Joel picked it up and looked down at it to see, scrawled in all caps: ‘GEL’. Well, that explained why it hadn’t sounded quite right.

“Wow, thanks...” Joel began sarcastically, peering at the barista’s name tag, which said ‘SEB’ very clearly, “... _Seeb_.” The barista frowned, and his eyebrows scrunched together, but before he could say anything, Joel turned on his heel and left the coffee shop.

He waited until he was outside to take a sip. It _was_ a good drink.

***

The next day, Joel found himself walking back into the same coffee shop. When he saw the same shock of blonde hair at the counter, he considered turning around and walking back out, but before he could make up his mind the barista caught sight of him and waved, one side of his mouth quirked up.

Joel groaned inwardly. He realized he’d been worried the barista wouldn’t remember him, but now he decided that this was actually worse.

But it was later in the day than last time, and there was no line, so Joel was left with no choice but to approach the counter and the grinning blonde. “Back again,” the barista drawled, leaning forward with his elbows on the counter. “What can I do you for today?”

“Uhh, grande caramelized honey latte, I guess,” Joel mumbled, scratching the back of his neck. He still wasn’t really sure whether that was a drink he was supposed to be embarrassed about ordering or not.

The barista smiled, looking genuinely happy. “Liked it yesterday?”

“Yeah.”

The barista pulled a grande cup off the stack and once again removed his Sharpie cap with his teeth. “Gel, right?”

Joel tried to stop himself from rolling his eyes. “Uh, no. Joel,” he corrected, making sure to say it loudly enough to not be mistaken.

“Ahh. Got it.” The barista tapped the end of the Sharpie to his right temple, the one covered in tattoos. “That makes more sense. That’s an actual name.”

Joel chuckled a bit at that. He didn’t have exact change this time, so he handed the barista a five-dollar bill. Their fingers brushed together a bit when the barista dropped his change into his palm, but he tried to ignore that.

With no one else in line, the barista got straight to making Joel’s coffee. When he finished he handed it to Joel, smiling brightly. “Here you go. Hope it’s good as yesterday.”

“I’m sure it will be,” Joel said out of automatic politeness, the barista’s smile so sincere he couldn’t help smiling back. Until he looked down at his cup and saw: ‘JOE’. “Are you fucking kidding me?” he grumbled.

The barista looked taken aback. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” Joel said with an exasperated sigh. “Thanks, _Sob_ ,” he said pointedly, before turning and walking out, ignoring the barista calling after him.

Once again, the coffee was great.

***

The third time Joel went to the coffee shop he wasn’t alone.

Lila barged in ahead of him in a huff. “Get me a caramelized honey latte, tall,” she told him before heading straight for the most out-of-the-way table. Joel grimaced. Okay, so it was _definitely_ a drink he should be embarrassed about ordering.

Luckily, they’d come into the shop around the same time Joel had the previous day, and it was just as empty. With a sigh of long-suffering he approached the counter, where his barista--the barista--was watching Lila, a slight frown on his face. “That your girlfriend?” he asked Joel in a low voice without taking his eyes from Lila.

Joel pulled a face. “God, no. Little sister’s best friend. Awful person. Never.” The barista’s gaze moved to Joel, bright blue eyes looking into his, and Joel cleared his throat a bit before continuing, “My sis wants us to bond more, or whatever. She's making us hang out while she works today. She doesn't seem to understand how much we fucking hate each other.”

The barista nodded, but didn’t say anything. Joel shifted on his feet uneasily, unsure if he was supposed to say or do something else. Finally he tilted his head toward Lila and said, “I mean, _I_ hate her, but if you’re interested, I could…” He trailed off awkwardly.

The barista laughed loudly, surprising Joel and causing Lila to look over at them with annoyance. “No, thanks. _I_ prefer to be the high-maintenance blonde in a relationship,” he said to Joel with a wink.

Before Joel could react to that with anything more than an uninvited little flop of his stomach, Lila was calling to him. “Jooooo-eeellllll,” she sing-songed in a way that barely disguised her impatience and contempt.

“Coming,” he shot back loudly, and turned back to the counter with a sigh. “Well. Coffee. Two caramelized honey lattes, I guess. One tall, one grande.” When the barista pulled out the cups, Joel pointed to them in turn, instructing, “Lila on the tall, Joel on the grande. _Joel_ ,” he said again for good measure. “J-O-E-L.”

The barista just nodded as he uncapped his Sharpie in his usual manner and scribbled on the cups. Joel handed over some cash and held his hand out for his change, but instead of dropping it, the barista slid the coins into his palm and gripped his fingers. Joel looked up at him with wide eyes, cheeks flushing a bit as the barista leaned toward him. “Want me to spit in her drink?” he whispered conspiratorially, looking completely serious.

Joel chuckled uncomfortably and looked away, trying to find anywhere for his eyes to land other than their hands or the barista’s intent blue gaze. “Uh, s’okay,” he mumbled, tugging his hand back out of the barista’s grasp. “Thanks anyway.”

Without looking back up he made his way over to where Lila was sitting and tapping rapidly on the screen on her phone. She glanced up when he sat down. “Is that your _boyfriend_?” she said scathingly, continuing to tap on her phone.

“Fuck off,” he snapped, slouching down in the booth. Lila didn't say anything else or look back at him again.

The two drinks took a little longer than his usual one, but eventually the barista called, “Joel?” Joel smiled a bit at hearing his name called correctly for once, and slid out of the seat to go grab their coffees. Out of habit he looked down to see what was written on his cup, even though the barista had said his name right.

‘SORRY ABOUT THE BITCH,’ the cup read.

Joel laughed out loud. “Thanks...Seb.”

Seb smiled and nodded, looking pleased. “Anytime,” he said with another wink.

Joel made his way back to Lila, trying to suppress his smile before he got there. Once he saw the look on her face, it vanished easily. Without so much as a thank you, she reached out to take the smaller cup from him. She took a sip and made a face. “I’ve had better,” she said sourly.

Joel glanced over to Seb, wondering if he’d spit in her coffee after all. Seb stared back at him with a straight face, then broke out into a grin as Lila shrieked and Joel jumped. “ _Milo_?” she exclaimed, thrusting her cup towards Joel to make him look. Sure enough, ‘MILO’ was written on the side of her cup in Seb’s all-caps scrawl.

Stifling a laugh, Joel forced himself to look back at her with as sympathetic an expression as he could muster. “Sorry. Barista’s a bit bad with names,” he said loudly, so that Seb would hear.

Lila went back to sipping her coffee and making faces, and after making sure the note on his own cup was angled so she couldn’t see it, Joel took a sip of his own. He didn’t know what Lila was complaining about; his coffee was as delicious as always.

***

When Joel pulled open the door to the coffee shop for the fourth day in a row, he was a little disappointed to see a pretty sizeable line, but got in it anyway. He craned his neck to look towards the front of the line and saw Seb behind the counter, looking bored and chewing on his Sharpie cap.

It wasn’t until Seb looked up and caught his eye that Joel realized he’d been staring. He felt his face immediately start to grow warm with embarrassment, but before he could look away Seb smiled at him, and the Sharpie cap fell out of his mouth.

Joel was too far away to hear, but it looked like Seb said “ _Fuck_ ” as he scrambled to recapture the runaway cap, a theory that was strengthened when the woman at the counter quickly clamped her hands over her small daughter’s ears. His reaching hand knocked over a full stack of cups, which he barely managed to save before they could topple to the floor. Finally he managed to retrieve the cap from where it had rolled behind the register. He straightened, and very carefully snapped the cap back onto the Sharpie. Joel hid a grin behind his hand and turned away.

When Joel made it up to the counter, Seb looked as cool and composed as ever, as if he hadn’t just blundered and cursed in front of a coffee shop full of people. “I see you survived your outing with the ABFOTLS,” he said casually. When Joel just looked at him in confusion, he clarified, “Awful Best Friend Of The Little Sister,” in a tone that implied that it should’ve been _obvious_.

“Oh. Right. Yeah, barely,” Joel replied with a sigh, rubbing a hand over his face. “She made me take her to see _Batman v Superman_ after we finished up here.”

Seb shrugged. “Well, at least she has good taste. The usual?” he asked, as he uncapped his Sharpie slowly using both hands instead of his mouth.

“Uh, sure,” Joel said, and Seb reached for a grande cup. “Good taste, though? Really? That movie sucks.”

It was a good thing Seb’s Sharpie cap was stuck firmly on the back of the marker instead of between his teeth, because it would’ve fallen right back out again with the way his mouth dropped open in shock. “Are. You. Serious.”

Joel shrugged. “Overrated. Boring. Bad. I don't think Lila even liked it. She was just trying to torture me.”

Seb shook his head disbelievingly. “ _Joel_ ,” he said, sounding disappointed. “I was _going_ to offer you this coffee on the house, for becoming such a loyal customer, but it goes against my religion to give free coffee to _haterz_.” From the way he drew out the end of the word, Joel could just tell he was thinking of it as a z rather than an s.

Joel just rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He’d brought exact change today, anyway; he slapped it down on the counter and walked away before Seb had even finished writing his name on his cup.

After a few minutes, Joel heard Seb call his name, and he walked back up to retrieve his coffee. When he reached out and grabbed it, Seb didn’t let go right away, and their fingers overlapped around the cup. Seb opened his mouth, looking like he wanted to say something, and Joel squinted at him questioningly. Had he really offended him that much? After a moment Seb closed his mouth, shrugged, and let go of the coffee. “Have a good day,” he said breezily before turning away to tend to the next customer.

A little thrown off by that final exchange, Joel didn’t think to look at what was written on his cup until he was several blocks away and his coffee was half gone. He looked down and was surprised to see the thick black ink of Seb’s Sharpie covering the entire back half of the cup.

He spotted a bench nearby and went to sit down so he could read the coffee cup message without the dangers of walking with a hot cup of coffee and reading at the same time.

‘I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU DON’T LIKE BVS WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU. YOU’RE SO WRONG AND I WANT TO PROVE IT. YOU HAVE TO WATCH IT WITH ME SO I CAN SHOW YOU HOW WRONG YOU ARE. TEXT ME XO SEB’

Underneath the insistent black caps was a phone number. Joel tried not to grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #SEBJOEL4LYFE


	2. Chapter 2

Seb was in the stockroom of the coffee shop when his phone vibrated in his pocket.

He scrambled to pull it out, which was always a bit of a struggle in his tight jeans. Muri glanced over from where she was taking inventory on a clipboard, looking like she _almost_ cared enough to ask, but decided against it and went back to her own business.

FROM: Unknown Number  
_I’m not wrong. You are._

Seb turned away so Muri couldn’t see his grin as he typed a response.

TO: Unknown Number  
_Lmao is this gel_

FROM: Unknown Number  
_No, it’s Joel._

Seb sniggered, running a hand through his hair and adding the number as a new contact as he thought about what to say next.

“Who the fuck is _Gel_?” Muri’s voice came suddenly from alarmingly close, and Seb jumped and whirled around.

“ _Jesus_ , Muriel!” he exclaimed. “Reading over my shoulder? Creep.”

“Asshole,” she shot back. “Seriously, you gonna get back to work? Or is this Gel person more important?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Seb muttered, turning away again and hunching over his phone so she couldn’t see the screen.

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_You taking me up on my offer then?_

FROM: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Sure. When?_

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Tomorrow night?_

When he didn’t get a reply immediately, he set his phone down next to him so he could get back to work, but he ended up checking it a couple times a minute anyway to make sure he didn’t miss any notifications.

After several long minutes, his phone finally buzzed again, and he snatched it up. 

FROM: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Can’t._

Seb’s lip turned out in a forceful pout, as if that could influence the current situation in his favor. But before he had a chance to respond, there was another buzz.

FROM: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_What about tonight?_

Then, immediately after:

FROM: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_There's an 8:15 showing at the theater a couple blocks away from the coffee shop._

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Yeah that works for me_  

FROM: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Cool. I'll meet you outside the theater at 8._

Seb paused before responding. He'd been intending to offer to pick Joel up. But maybe that would be weird? Probably, if Joel's first instinct was to meet there. 

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Sounds good_

And then, he decided to go for it.

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_;)_

Joel didn't respond.

 

***

 

Seb pulled into the theater parking lot just before 8. He'd changed out of his work uniform and into something he hoped would be nice enough in case this was a date, but not _too_ nice in case it wasn't.

As he walked up to the front of the theater he saw Joel was already there, waiting on a bench. He was a little surprised to see that Joel had changed, too, even though the shirt he'd been wearing earlier had been perfectly movie-appropriate. The button-down he was wearing now was much more...date-ish. He looked nice.

“Hey,” Seb called out when he got closer, and Joel looked up with a start. Seb thought that maybe he smiled a little bit when he saw him, but it was hard to tell in the limited light from the street lamps.

Joel stood up, running a hand down the front of his shirt. “Hey,” he replied, and instead of falling down to his side his hand stayed at waist level for a moment, tensing awkwardly, like he was unsure whether they should shake hands or something. Seb wasn't sure either, so he kept his hands in his pockets just to be safe.

There was a brief silence in which they both looked back and forth between each other's faces and their own feet. Seb noticed for the first time that Joel was significantly taller than him. Finally he cleared his throat. “Tickets are on me,” he said, trying to alleviate some of the awkwardness.

But Joel shook his head. “No, I've got it.”

Seb gave him an affronted look. “Excuse me, but _I_ was the one to invite you to a movie you don't even like, and now you insult my generosity?”

Joel chuckled a little and looked down, rubbing the back of his neck. “I, um. Well. I sort of work here. So it's free.”

Seb’s eyes widened. “ _Free_? Shit, I _knew_ I should've given you that coffee on the house today!” he reprimanded himself.

Joel just rolled his eyes and shrugged. “It's fine. Come on.” He led Seb past the ticket booth and into the theater. When they reached the ticket taker, the kid waved to Joel, but squinted at Seb suspiciously.

“He’s with me,” Joel told him, and he nodded and held out a fist expectantly. Joel ignored it and walked past, but Seb couldn’t leave the poor guy hanging. He bumped the fist with his own, adding an explosive noise as he drew back. Even though he could only see Joel’s back, he was sure he was rolling his eyes.

Joel started to walk towards the hallway containing the showrooms, but Seb stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. “Wait, what about treats?” he asked, almost whining. “We need popcorn, and sodas, and maybe Icees too, and definitely candy…”

He steered Joel towards the snack counter by the shoulder. They ended up with a soda for Joel, an Icee for Seb, three boxes of sour straws, and an extra large tub of popcorn to share. Seb insisted on paying for it all, and it didn't take much argument for Joel to let him.

Refreshments in hand, Joel led and Seb followed close behind into a showroom towards the back of the theater. It was on the small side, and it was completely empty. “So, uh, where do you want to sit?” Joel asked.

Seb glanced around the showroom in mock consideration. “Wherever we can find room,” he replied, eyes wide with exaggerated concern, and Joel cracked a real smile for the first time that night.

“How about there?” Joel suggested, using his soda-holding hand to gesture towards the front row of the back section, the one with the railings right in front of it. Seb nodded and bounded over to the suggested row, taking the very middle seat for himself. Joel made his way over more slowly, being careful not to spill any of their near-overflowing popcorn.

When Joel sat down on his right, Seb stretched out leisurely in his seat, resting his crossed ankles atop the railing in front of them. “Damn, I can’t believe you rented out an entire theater for me,” he drawled, gesturing grandly to the empty room.

Joel elbowed him sharply in the ribs, making him gasp. “Shut up. It’s empty because it’s a fucking bad movie no one wants to see.”

Seb immediately turned to Joel with a very serious expression. “Joel. Listen to me.” Joel faced him, an eyebrow raised. “We are here for you to give this movie a second chance, and I demand that you take this seriously.”

Joel scoffed. “Second chance? Seb, I work here. I have to have seen this movie at least five times by now.”

Unfazed, Seb amended, “We are here for you to give this movie a sixth chance, and I demand that you take this seriously.”

Joel rolled his eyes. “Fine. I'm taking it seriously.” And then the lights dimmed, and Seb shushed Joel loudly, making him roll his eyes yet again, but Seb was _pretty sure_ he was smiling a little bit, too.

They watched the movie mostly in silence, with Seb occasionally pointing something out to Joel excitedly and then shushing him when he tried to respond. A couple of times their fingers brushed when they tried to grab popcorn at the same time, and their knees bumped together every so often, but Joel always drew back quickly. Seb tried not to be bothered by that.

When it ended, Seb turned to Joel, feeling smug. “So? Good, right?” he said, confident that Joel would agree.

He was shocked when Joel shook his head. “Nope. Still bad. Even worse the sixth time, possibly.”

Seb groaned and dropped his forehead onto Joel's shoulder in defeat, trying to ignore the way Joel tensed up beneath him. “Fine. I give up. You can go back to your rude, hater-ly ways.”

Joel chuckled. “Never stopped.” He shrugged Seb off and stood up, stretching his arms over his head, and there was a sudden loud clatter. “Shit, my phone!” He ducked down to look for it, muttering, “I can't see where it went…”

“I’ll call it!” Seb offered gallantly, whipping out his own phone. He ignored Joel's protests and called, and was immediately rewarded with a loud vibrating noise near his feet. “Got it!” he exclaimed, reaching down to pluck the phone off the ground.

“Thanks, now give it here,” Joel demanded, stretching out a hand, and looking oddly nervous.

Seb went to hand the still-buzzing phone to Joel, but then he caught sight of what the screen said.

_Incoming call from: Seb (Hot Barista)_

Seb’s eyes widened. “ _Hot Barista_?” he gasped melodramatically, pulling the phone back out of Joel's reach when he tried to make a grab for it. “Why, Joel! Why didn't you say you thought so!”

Joel took a step back, face a deep crimson, fists clenching and unclenching like he might actually punch Seb. “Give. Me. My. Fucking. Phone,” he growled through gritted teeth.

“Okay, okay,” Seb surrendered, a little nervous, offering the phone back to Joel. Joel snatched it out of his hand and stormed out of the theater as Seb watched helplessly.

Quickly, Seb picked up their trash and brought it to the garbage can outside the showroom. By the time he made it out there, Joel was nowhere to be seen, and he pulled out his phone with a frown.

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Where are you?_

TO: Gel (Caramelized Honey Latte Guy)  
_Joel its ok just come back_

When there was no response after a few minutes, Seb walked slowly towards the exit, stopping at the ticket boy. “You seen Joel?”

The kid looked confused. “Uh, yeah, he left.”

Seb cursed under his breath, but thanked the kid with another fist bump, not bothering with the explosion this time.

He made his way to the parking lot, contemplating. Joel thought he was _hot_. That was nice, but only a small bright spot against the hurt of Joel walking out on him. He got into his sleek black car and reluctantly began the drive home. This wasn't exactly how he'd seen the evening going.

A couple blocks away he was surprised to see Joel walking down the sidewalk, shoulders hunched, hands shoved deep in his pockets.

Seb slowed to a crawl and rolled down the passenger side window. “Joel!” he called out. Joel automatically looked up at his name, but scowled and looked away when he saw who it was, starting to walk faster.

Undeterred, Seb pulled close to the sidewalk to drive alongside Joel. He tried to keep one eye on Joel and one on the road. “Did you walk to the theater?”

“Don't have a car,” Joel replied shortly without looking at him.

“How far away do you live?”

“Not far. Just a few more blocks.”

Seb shook his head vigorously. “Get in.”

“No. I'm fine.”

Seb slowed to a stop. “ _Joel_. Please.”

Joel obstinately walked several more steps before eventually halting. He turned around slowly, his expression reluctant and his face amazingly still red. Seb made a show of putting the car in park and leaning over to unlock the passenger door, never taking his eyes off Joel.

Finally Joel heaved a sigh. “Fine,” he snapped, marching over to Seb’s car and letting himself in. Seb smiled at him hesitantly, but Joel didn't even look back at him as he buckled his seatbelt. “Nice car,” he mumbled, slouching down in his seat and turning towards the window.

“Uh, thanks. I’m leasing it,” Seb said, scratching the bridge of his nose under his glasses. “Where to?”

“Straight ahead for now.”

Seb shifted gears and started to drive. They rode in complete silence, other than occasional directions from Joel, and Seb wanted to scream from the awkwardness of it. He was relieved when Joel finally said, “Stop here.”

Seb looked around them dubiously. “You live here?” he asked, trying hard to keep the surprise out of his voice. Joel just shrugged.

“Well. Thanks for the ride,” Joel said gruffly, still not meeting Seb’s eyes. He unbuckled his seatbelt, shoved the door open, and slid out of the car. Seb had just opened his mouth to respond when Joel slammed the car door shut.

Seb watched as Joel walked up the poorly-lit path to a door in a dingy apartment building and was let inside by someone with a flash of ginger hair. Then he dropped his head onto the steering wheel with a groan. “Fuck me,” he said to no one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's an alternate fluffier ending to this chapter that I might post as an extra tidbit somewhere?? idk
> 
> #SEBJOEL4LYFE


	3. Chapter 3

Joel didn't go back to the coffee shop the next day, or the day after that.

He walked past it a few times. It was hard to avoid on the fastest route to and from the theater. Each time he glanced at the windows, but the glare kept him from seeing into the shop, and he quickly moved along before anyone could notice him.

Seb texted him twice: a  _ Hey _ the night after the movie, and the next morning,  _ We ok? _ Joel ignored both. What was the point? He’d been on what felt an awful lot like a date with possibly the most good-looking person he’d ever interacted with, and had ruined it by being enough of an absolute goddamn moron to have a testament to that written  _ on his phone _ where anyone could see it. He didn’t see any coming back from that.

The third day after what he’d privately taken to referring to as the Hot Barista Fiasco, he stopped outside the shop. He still couldn’t really see inside, which was unfortunate, because possibly Seb wasn’t even there and he could get some coffee without an awkward confrontation, but without being able to tell from the outside he wasn’t sure if it was worth the risk. He mentally weighed the pros and cons.

PROS:  
Caffeine  
Delicious warm drink  
Might get to see Seb

CONS:  
Might have to see Seb  
Embarrassment  
So much fucking embarrassment

Before he could decide what to do, the door to the shop swung open, nearly hitting him. “Watch it,” he automatically snapped, then immediately wished he hadn’t when he saw who it was.

Seb stood before him, looking just as surprised as Joel felt. He had a gigantic coffee cup in one hand and was still propping the door open with the other. They just looked at each other for a long moment until finally Seb took a hesitant step towards him, letting the door swing shut.

“Joel. Hey,” he said evenly, taking a sip from his disgustingly huge coffee. His face scrunched for a moment, and Joel wondered if he’d burnt his tongue, but he quickly continued. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m on my way to work,” Joel replied, too caught off guard to feel embarrassed. Seb continued to look at him like he was waiting for more, but Joel decided that if he wanted to know the answer to the very specific question  _ Why are you loitering outside my place of work _ , that should’ve been what he asked. “What’re  _ you _ doing out here? Shouldn’t you be inside, spelling innocent customers’ names wrong?” he said with a forced smile, trying to show that he was joking.

Seb laughed a little bit, and Joel’s fake smile turned briefly into a real one. “I’m on my break,” Seb informed him. “I was about to go for a walk.” He paused, and ran a hand through his hair. “I could walk to the theater with you? If you want?”

Ah, there was the embarrassment. Going to the theater together. A great reminder of the Hot Barista Fiasco. Joel could feel his face heating up, and he looked away, rubbing the back of his neck. “Um, sure. That’s fine.”

“Awesome.” Seb grinned. “Do you have time to wait for me for just a minute? I need to grab something.”

Joel shrugged. “Go ahead.” With that Seb flung open the coffee shop door and dashed back inside.

He returned a couple minutes later holding a second coffee, which he held out to Joel. “The usual,” he said with a brilliant smile, as though Joel hadn’t made a complete fool of himself the last time they saw each other, as though Joel hadn’t been ignoring and avoiding him.

Joel wanted to sink into the concrete. He’d fucked up.

“Thanks,” he muttered, his face burning with shame as he took the cup from Seb. He reached for his wallet so he could pay Seb back, but Seb shook his head.

“Don’t worry about it. I owed you for the free movie, anyway.”

“Oh. Thanks,” Joel said again.  He started up walking again, and Seb fell into step beside him.

They walked without speaking for a minute, then both tried to talk at the same time.

“So how have you--”

“Sorry I never--”

They both cut off, laughing awkwardly. “You first,” Seb said.

Joel took a deep breath. “Sorry I never texted you back,” he began. “I’ve been really...you know, really busy with…” He stopped as soon as he realized how idiotic his excuse sounded. “Sorry,” he mumbled, dragging a hand down his face. He took a huge gulp of his latte, hoping it would just melt his entire tongue down to nothing so he couldn’t say anything stupid ever again, but unfortunately, it was the perfect temperature.

Seb gave a nonchalant shrug, not looking at Joel. “It’s cool. I get it. I just thought--” He huffed out a hard little laugh. “I just thought you were maybe, I dunno, interested.” He turned his head to the side, but Joel could still see the edges of a flush rising to his face as he said, “You know, like. In me.”

Joel came to an abrupt halt. “You  _ thought _ ?” he said incredulously, almost angrily. Seb had continued to walk a couple steps ahead but stopped at that, turning back to face Joel with an expression of surprise and confusion.

Joel stepped towards him, scowling. “You just  _ thought _ that maybe I was interested in the obscenely attractive person I kept coming back to see, who basically asked me out, who was literally in my phone as  _ Hot fucking Barista _ ?” His coffee cup was beginning to dent under the increasing pressure of his grip.

Seb’s mouth opened and closed several times, with no sound coming out. Joel took one step closer to him and lowered his voice. “You  _ knew _ , Seb.  _ I _ was the one who thought.”

With an air of finality he started to walk past Seb, but he didn’t even make it two steps before Seb grabbed his arm and spun him back around.

“Are you fucking serious?” Seb practically shouted, looking furious. Joel tried to pull his arm away, but Seb didn’t let go. “I didn’t know  _ anything _ ! About what you thought, or felt, or any of that shit. You kept coming back? So what? I make good fucking coffee. And seeing your phone didn’t do anything either. All  _ that _ told me is that you’re not blind. News flash:  _ Most _ people think I’m hot,” he said, releasing Joel’s arm so he could gesture wildly at himself.

Joel could feel his face on fire. “I--” he tried, but Seb cut him off.

“No. None that means  _ anything _ ,” he snarled, fixing Joel with an icy glare that made his insides squirm. “You said it your goddamn self.  _ I _ asked  _ you _ out. ‘Text me, X-O, Seb,’” he said in a high-voiced mimicry of his own coffee cup note. “Do you have any idea how much I kicked myself for that until you texted me, not knowing whether or not you would? All I’ve done is put myself out there, and all  _ you’ve _ done is be an ass.”

Joel started at Seb in shock. He seemed to be finished, and was glaring at Joel with pursed lips. “I was...I…” he floundered, then moaned and covered his face with a hand. “Oh, god, I’m such an asshole.”

“At least we’re on the same page about one thing,” Seb grumbled. But he reached out to touch Joel’s arm again, nudging him back into motion, and they both started walking again slowly. “Well, maybe more than one thing,” he added a little less harshly, and Joel was pretty sure some color was coming to his cheeks again.

“I mean, yeah. It seems like...that is the case,” Joel agreed hesitantly. As if they’d rehearsed it, both of them took a swig from their coffees simultaneously.

They walked the remaining block to the theater in a silence that was somewhat less uncomfortable than many of their previous ones, and stopped just before they reached the bench they’d met at for their--Joel could call it this with certainty now--date.

“Well, this is me.”

Seb nodded. “Sure is.”

“I guess-- Can we-- I’m sorry.” Joel kicked at the ground. “Can we have a do-over? If you still want? One where there’s at least a chance I might not come off as such a raging dick?”

He lifted his eyes from his shoes to see Seb watching him with half a smile. “Yeah. That would be good. This time we can even watch a movie  _ you _ like,” Seb offered, sounding like that was a huge sacrifice on his part.

Joel laughed. “Okay. And...maybe not here,” he added, gesturing to the theater. “Feels kind of weird.”

Seb shrugged. “Fine by me. Your place? My place?”

“Um…” Joel thought about the old, tiny apartment he shared with his sister, and the ludicrously nice car Seb had given him a ride in. “Maybe yours, if that’s okay.”

“Sure. I’ll pick you up at nine?”

Joel frowned. “You don’t have to do that.” He realized he didn’t actually know where Seb lived, and it might not be within walking distance, but he could probably find a bus or something if he had to.

“I know, but it’s good  _ manners _ to pick up your date,” Seb said matter-of-factly.

At the word ‘date’ Joel felt a blush rise to his face, and he pressed his lips together to keep from smiling. “I guess that’s true. Fine, then. Nine is good. I’ll bring the movie, and some snacks.”

Seb beamed. “Great.” He extended a hand. Joel took it, and Seb pulled him in for an awkward half-hug. When they pulled apart Seb’s face was a little flushed, and he cleared his throat. “Right. Well. Nine.”

“Nine,” Joel agreed, and watched as Seb smiled and headed back for the coffee shop.

When he walked into the theater, he gave the ticket boy a fist bump.

 

***

 

“Where are you going?” Pemberly asked from the bathroom doorway.

Joel was trying hard to get his hair to look right. “I’ve got a date,” he answered. Was this the side he usually parted his hair on? He thought so, but it looked all wrong, so he tried sweeping it to the other side.

“With who?”

“Uh, that guy I went to the movie with a few days ago. Seb.” He glanced away from the mirror to see his little sister’s reaction.

She just grinned. “Cool.”

“Yeah.” Joel looked back to the mirror, and saw himself smiling. And also how ridiculous his hair looked. The first side had been right. He hastily moved it back.

Pemberly leaned against the doorway. “Well, as your legal guardian, I should get to meet him.”

Joel rolled his eyes. “You’re not my legal guardian. You’re not even a legal adult, Pem.”

“Yeah, but  _ almost _ . The second one, at least.”

“Tell you what. You can meet him if we go out again after this. I was...sort of a huge dick to him last time, so we’ll have to see if this time goes any better. Deal?”

Pem scoffed, but nodded. “Deal. Don’t fuck it up, though. Lila says he’s really hot.”

Joel’s face reddened a bit. “Yeah. He is.”

Joel glanced at the clock. It was 8:56. Judging by Seb’s punctuality in arriving to the theater the other night, he could be there any minute, and Joel didn’t want to risk him making it up to the door and somehow inside the apartment.

He squeezed past Pemberly and went to look out the front window. Sure enough, Seb had just parked in the same place he’d dropped Joel off after the movie, and was starting to get out of his car. Joel did a quick pat-check to make sure he had everything he needed--phone, wallet, keys. Then he called, “Bye, Pem,” grabbed the movie and the grocery bag of snacks he’d bought on his way home from work, and rushed out the door.

He met Seb halfway between the door and the car. “Hey,” he said breathlessly.

Seb frowned, looking annoyed. “I would’ve come to the door.”

Joel shrugged. “It’s fine. I was ready to head out, anyway.”

They walked over to the car, with Seb grumbling, “You don’t let me pay for your movie, or pick you up at the door…”

Feeling a little bad, Joel promised, “Next time,” and Seb's face lit up.

The drive to Seb’s was much more comfortable than the last ride they’d taken together. The radio was on quietly in the background, some talk show, it sounded like.

Joel wanted to say something, preferably something cool and funny and interesting, but he ended up going with the first thing he thought of. “So, get anyone’s name wrong at work today?”

Seb frowned--more like pouted, Joel thought. “You overestimate how much I do that,” he said, and it was almost a whine. “I’m usually really good. You’re just exceptionally shitty at enunciating.”

Joel raised his eyebrows. “I can’t believe you’re starting off our date by calling me  _ shitty _ .”

“Yeah, well, I also called you exceptional,” Seb retorted, giving him a dazzling smile.

Joel couldn’t argue with that. He couldn’t really say anything. He sank back into his seat, trying to keep the grin from spreading across his face.

It turned out Seb didn’t live too far away; it would’ve taken Joel about a half hour to walk there, but with Seb’s quick and careful (albeit aggressive) driving they made it there in under ten minutes. Joel was unsurprised but still a little awed when they approached a huge apartment building that looked like it had been built within the last couple of years.

They parked in a designated space in an underground parking garage and took an elevator up to the fifth floor. “Do you live in an apartment or in a hotel?” Joel muttered when they exited the elevator into a long, cleanly furnished hallway. Seb half-smiled, half-grimaced, looking a little embarrassed.

“Here we are,” Seb announced when they reached a door at the end of the hallway. He pulled a key card out of his wallet--Joel rolled his eyes; it basically  _ was _ a hotel--and swiped to let them in. When the door beeped, Seb pushed it open and held it for Joel to walk past.

Joel’s mouth fell open as he walked into the apartment, barely registering when Seb followed him in and shut the door behind them. The front room alone was probably as big as his and Pem’s entire apartment, with a variety of sofas arranged neatly and a TV that took up more than half of the wall.

While Joel gaped, Seb gently pried the grocery bag of snacks out of his hand. “You like it?” he asked. He still seemed a bit embarrassed, but also like he was trying not to laugh. Joel just nodded. “Cool. You can sit wherever you want. I’ll go take care of these,” he said, giving the bag a shake, before disappearing into the adjoining kitchen.

Joel resisted the urge to test out every couch in the room and instead just headed for the one with a direct view of the TV. He sat down a little right of center, still taking in the room. Like in a hotel, there were very few personal touches--no photos or anything like that. But there  _ were _ shelves and shelves of movies and books surrounding the TV. He’d have to check those out later.

Joel started at the sound of popcorn starting to pop and looked over just as Seb emerged from the kitchen, precariously balancing a few plates and bowls filled with the snacks Joel had brought, along with two glasses of soda. He set everything down carefully on the coffee table in front of Joel, then plopped down on the couch so close to Joel’s left that they were touching.

“So, what are we watching?” he asked, leaning into Joel to peer at the movie in his white-knuckled grip.

Stomach fluttering distractingly, Joel forced himself to lift the movie to show Seb. “ _ The _ \-- _ The King’s Speech _ ,” he stammered. Oh, the irony.

“Oh, cool. I never saw this,” Seb said, looking genuinely excited. He tugged it out of Joel’s hands and stood back up. Without Seb pressed against his side, Joel was able to breathe again, but immediately missed the warmth.

Seb bent to get the movie set up, and as he did the back of his shirt rode up slightly, just enough for Joel to see that the tattoos on the right side of his face and his right arm extended down the right side of his torso, too. Joel wondered how far down they went. He felt his face heating up and averted his gaze quickly.

After getting the movie set up and retrieving the popcorn from the kitchen, Seb flipped off the lights of the front room, leaving a dim one on in the kitchen. He returned to the couch, this time leaving a couple inches of space between himself and Joel. “Ready?” Joel nodded, and Seb hit play.

_ The King’s Speech _ was one of Joel’s favorite movies. Working at a movie theater, he ended up seeing a lot of movies way too many times, and they’d be ruined for him. This was one of the few movies that was just as interesting to him every time he watched it.

Well, almost every time. This time, there was something a little more interesting sitting right next to him.

The two inches of space between them felt hot and tense. Joel’s mind whirred, trying to figure out how to close the gap. Did he have to get up under the pretense of refilling something or using the bathroom, so he could sit back down the way Seb had before? Should he put his arm around Seb and pull him in closer? Could he just...move closer, slowly, gradually, so that it would happen in a way that  _ seemed _ natural?

He decided to try out that last one. He lifted his arms and stretched, arching himself up off the couch. When he came back down, he’d closed about half the tiny distance between the two of them. Good. That was better. Not to mention  _ totally _ casual and inconspicuous. Joel folded his arms and started to calculate how long he should wait before doing it again.

Seb suddenly shifted, scooting over to fully close the gap. He pressed his leg against Joel’s, leaned lightly against his arm, and let his hand fall casually to rest on Joel’s knee. Joel accidentally let out a tiny gasp.

Alright, well, that was one way to do it.

Joel kept his eyes fixed on the TV for the next few minutes, not really seeing it, just trying to get his pulse and the flush of his face under control, but it was hard when he could feel the warmth of Seb all along his side and on his leg.

Finally he looked back down at the hand on his knee. It was curled casually, invitingly, the tips of Seb’s fingers just lightly touching his kneecap.

_ Okay. It’s fine. It’s cool. You’re fine _ . Joel slowly unfolded his arms and reached for Seb’s hand, his fingers sliding across Seb’s wrist and wrapping around it loosely. His thumb traced the tattoos on the back of Seb’s hand, his forearm. He wasn’t even pretending to pay attention to the movie anymore, and it didn’t seem like Seb was either; out of the corner of his eye he could see him watching their hands.

Joel trailed his fingers to the inside of Seb’s wrist, and Seb obligingly turned his hand over. The tattoos extended all the way to where his wrist met his palm, and Joel wondered how much it had hurt to get them there. He brushed his fingertips up into Seb’s palm and suddenly Seb jerked his hand away.

Joel looked up at Seb, worried that he’d done something wrong, but he was smiling. “That tickles,” he laughed, and took Joel’s hand firmly in his, interlocking their fingers. Joel’s heart skipped a beat.

“Wouldn’t have guessed you were ticklish,” he said, nudging Seb’s shoulder with his own.

Seb’s eyes narrowed at Joel. “And you’re not?” He reached over with his other hand and pushed Joel’s sleeve up to the elbow so he could run his fingertips up the inside of his arm. “See how  _ you _ like it.”

Joel did like it. It tickled, sure, but only pleasantly so. Seb traced tiny circles into Joel’s skin with just the tip of his index finger, watching him for a reaction, but Joel was determined not to give anything away. He just hoped Seb couldn’t feel his pulse rushing in the veins of his forearm.

Once Seb made his way back down to where their wrists were pressed together he stopped, and Joel shook his head. “See? Not ticklish.”

Seb huffed. "No fun," he complained. He left his hand on Joel’s wrist and slumped down, leaning into Joel’s arm. Joel patted his hand consolingly.

They stayed that way for the rest of the movie, leaning into each other, hands intertwined. Once Joel was finally able to pull his attention away from the warm hand in his and the blonde hair tickling his neck, he started to worry that Seb didn’t like the movie. But then Colin Firth was swearing loudly, and Seb was laughing even louder with his eyes closed and his forehead pressed into Joel’s shoulder, and Joel’s chest felt warm and tingly.

When the movie finished, Joel turned his head where it was resting against Seb’s so that his nose was in his hair. “So what did you think?” he asked, rubbing his thumb across the back of Seb’s hand.

He felt Seb shrug. “I mean, it’s no  _ Batman v Superman _ ,” he began, and Joel elbowed him with a scoff. “But I liked it.” He squeezed Joel’s hand. “Well, at least the last half that I was paying attention to,” he added with an embarrassed little laugh.

Joel laughed, too. "The first half is good. I can’t believe you weren’t paying attention,” he said, shaking his head slowly with mock disappointment.

Seb huffed and poked at Joel’s leg. “Like it wasn’t totally your fault. How could I possibly be expected to pay attention to anything else with you so obviously trying to get all up next to me?”

“Hey,  _ you _ were the one to start cuddling up to me and touching my leg and stuff. Completely unfair.”

“Fine. I guess we’re both at fault,” Seb conceded. He disentangled himself from Joel and stood up to stretch, his shirt pulling up to show the tattoos on his side again. This time Joel let himself look a little longer, moving his eyes away when Seb finished stretching and frowned. “Ah, shit, we didn’t eat any of the snacks. What should we do with them?”

Joel shrugged. “We can just leave them here for next time,” he said casually, and felt a little thrill when Seb's face lit up once again at the promise of a next time.

“Sounds good,” Seb agreed happily. He retrieved the various boxes and bags from the kitchen and Joel helped put everything back in its original packaging. They carried everything back into the huge kitchen, and Seb pointed out which of the dozens of cupboards Joel should put things in.

When they finished cleaning up they stood facing each other in the kitchen, both smiling hesitantly. Joel wasn’t sure what to do now. He didn’t want to go home, not yet.

“Do you…” He paused. Seb watched him expectantly, hopefully. “Do you maybe want to, I dunno, go for a walk or something?”

Seb waggled his eyebrows. "Very romantic," he said, and Joel flushed.

“We don’t have to if I need to go, or if you don’t want--"

“I do want to,” Seb interrupted him, stepping forward and putting a hand on his arm. “Let’s do it. Just give me a minute, okay?”

"Alright."

Seb flashed him a smile and disappeared down a hallway. Joel meandered back to the front room and over to Seb’s movie and book collections. Given what he knew of Seb’s taste in movies, he wasn’t sure what to expect. He was surprised to see a wide variety of movies, ranging from classics to garbage. Even more surprising was Seb’s book collection; about half were novels by well-known sci-fi and fantasy authors, and the other half were young adult vampire books.

After a few minutes Seb returned. “Ready to go?”

“Sure.” Joel started to pull his jacket on, but stopped with his second arm halfway into its sleeve when he saw that Seb was just waiting by the door without anything over his short-sleeved V-neck. “Do you want to grab a coat or something?”

Seb shook his head. “I don’t get cold,” he said smugly.

Joel had thought it was already getting kind of cold when Seb had picked him up, and he didn’t get cold easily. He frowned, but said, “Suit yourself,” and shrugged his own jacket the rest of the way on.

He followed Seb back out into the hallway and into the elevator, where Seb pressed the button labelled ‘L’. The doors opened on a gigantic, extravagant lobby, which Seb strode through confidently, waving to someone at a desk as he passed.

Joel hurried to catch up with him. “Are you  _ sure _ this isn’t a hotel?” he asked in a low voice. Seb just laughed.

The automatic doors slid open to let them out, and they were greeted with a rush of cool damp air. Joel glanced at Seb, feeling like he  _ really _ should’ve worn a jacket, but he seemed fine for the time being.

They walked out into the night, silent and not touching at first, but after a minute Joel slid his hand into Seb’s, and they both laughed.

“So, no offense,” Joel began, then winced at himself for starting with that. Seb seemed unperturbed, though, so he kept going. “But how can you afford to live somewhere like that--“ he waved his hand back in the general direction of the apartment building “--working at a coffee shop? I wouldn’t guess that was a particularly lucrative occupation.”

Seb laughed awkwardly and ran his free hand through his hair. “Yeah, working at a coffee shop isn’t. Owning one is, though.”

Joel gave him an incredulous look. “You  _ own _ the shop? Seriously?”

“Long story.”

“We’ve got time, don’t we?”

Seb gave him a half-smile. “Yeah, I guess. If you’re really that interested.” When Joel insisted that he was, Seb launched into the story of how he dropped out of college to become an entrepreneur, and how he worked his way up from a tiny hole-in-the-wall store owner to a successful businessman in the span of just a couple of years. Joel found himself wondering why Seb had been reluctant to tell him this; it seemed to be a story he enjoyed telling.

“Wow,” Joel said when Seb finished, shaking his head. “I can’t believe it. I’m dating an  _ entrepreneur _ .”

When he realized what he’d said-- _ dating _ \--he felt his face turning red. Seb just grinned, and tugged on his hand to pull him closer.

“So what about you? Is it your dream to work at a movie theater?”

Joel shook his head so hard it made him briefly dizzy. “Fuck, no. I’m taking a gap year to save money for med school.”

“Damn. That’s cool,” Seb said, sounding genuinely impressed, which made Joel smile.

“Yeah, well, we’ll see. The theater doesn’t pay as much as I’d like, and I’ve got Pem to take care of, too.”

“Pem?”

“Pemberly, my sister.”

“Ah. Is she the redhead who answered the door for you the other day?”

Joel looked at Seb, surprised. “You saw her? You were still there?”

Seb glanced down, embarrassed. “Just wanted to make sure you got in safe,” he muttered, rubbing his nose.

“I think you think my neighborhood is more dangerous than it actually is,” Joel told him, but he was grinning.

They’d ended up in a nearby park, walking along a winding sidewalk lit only by a few distant street lamps and the moon. It was ridiculously, cheesily romantic, Joel thought, but he wasn’t going to complain. There were no complaints to be had about going on an accidentally romantic walk with a gorgeous entrepreneur.

Suddenly Joel heard a familiar noise coming from all around them, and his eyes widened. “Oh, fuck. We gotta go,” he warned, trying to tug Seb back into what he guessed would be a safe zone, but Seb didn’t seem to notice, and kept moving forward.

The sprinklers turned on, narrowly missing Joel, and hitting Seb full in the side.

Seb screeched and jumped forward, which unfortunately was the way the sprinkler was moving as well. Joel couldn’t help snickering as he watched Seb try to escape by running down the curving sidewalk away from him, effectively getting hit by every nearby sprinkler along the way.

Once he finally made it away from the spray of the sprinklers he turned back to Joel, who was now a good couple hundred feet away. “I’m not coming back that way,” he shouted.

“I’ll come to you,” Joel called back. He navigated his way through and around the sprinklers until he reached Seb, sustaining only a minor spritz of water on the leg of his jeans.

Seb, on the other hand, was nearly soaked through. Most of his thin V-neck was plastered so tight to his skin that Joel could faintly see his tattoos through it. His pants were already tight and dark enough that it was hard to tell, but Joel would guess that they’d been equally affected.

“You okay?” Joel asked, trying not to laugh.

“Totally fine,” Seb said. The cool wind swept around them, breezing past Joel’s coat, and Seb folded his arms across his chest. At first glance, the move seemed casual, but then Joel noticed the goosebumps on his upper arms and his slight shivering.

“You’re freezing.”

“I’m fine,” Seb insisted, but his teeth were clenched together, and Joel realized it was to keep them from chattering.

“No, here, take this.” Joel slipped his jacket off, ignoring Seb’s protests, and held it out, prodding Seb with it. When another gust of wind hit them, he was glad he’d worn long sleeves, and Seb finally took the jacket, grumbling incoherently.

He slid his arms into the sleeves and adjusted the collar. “How do I look?” he asked, tugging at the ends of the jacket.

It was too big on him--not big enough to dwarf him, just big enough to be endearing. There were droplets of water on his glasses, and his hair was soaked in the front but not the back, and half his face was streaked where he’d tried to wipe the sprinkler water off with a wet hand.

Joel’s breath caught in his throat. Seb was waiting for his response, but he didn’t think there was anything he could say that could do Seb justice in this moment. So instead Joel stepped forward, gripped the collar of the jacket, and kissed him.

Seb reacted immediately, putting his hands on Joel’s waist and leaning up to kiss him back. With that encouragement Joel moved closer so their chests were almost touching, tightened the grip of one hand, and slid the other to the back of Seb’s neck.

When he pulled back, Seb had a goofy grin on his face. “You didn’t really answer my que--"

Joel kissed him again. “Shut up,” he muttered against Seb’s lips, and for once, Seb listened.


	4. Chapter 4

It was a busy morning at the coffee shop, but that didn’t stop Seb from texting Joel under the counter with one hand while he took orders with the other.

To: Gel (We Are Dating)  
_ Joellll I havent seen you in like a month. When are you going to need coffee _

From: Gel (We Are Dating)  
_ It hasn’t even been a week. And I always need coffee. That’s why I have a coffee maker at home. _

To: Gel (We Are Dating)  
_ Then what is the fucking point of dating a coffee shop owner!!!!!!! _

From: Gel (We Are Dating)  
_ You’re right, I guess there isn’t one. Nice knowing you. _

Seb’s finger was holding down the ‘o’ key and had just typed the seventeenth in a drawn-out  _ Nooooooooooooooooo _ when he got another text.

From: Gel (We Are Dating)  
_ By the way, if you weren’t so busy ignoring the shit out of your customers, you’d have seen me by now. _

Seb’s head shot up, startling the young woman at the front of the line in the middle of whatever she was saying. Seb continued to ignore her, instead standing on tiptoe until he saw Joel near the back of the line, wearing the same jacket as he had on their date—Seb decided he loved that jacket—and a self-satisfied smirk.

“Cut to the front!” Seb called, gesturing insistently, but Joel shook his head.

“Why does  _ he _ get special treatment?” the woman at the counter demanded. She looked personally offended, and Seb realized she’d probably been trying to flirt with him while she was ordering.  _ They always are _ , he thought with an inward sigh of long-suffering.

“He’s dating the owner,” Seb said dismissively. He was still beckoning to Joel, and Joel was still shaking his head, like an obstinate dick.

The girl folder her arms and stuck up her chin. “Well, I’d like to talk to the owner, then.”

Seb finally turned his attention to her, fixing her with his most scathing glare. “You already are.”

She paled. “Oh. Um. S-sorry,” she stammered awkwardly.

Seb heaved a sigh of exasperation, pushing his glasses up with his fingertips to rub at his eyes. “Your drink is on the house for the trouble. Okay?” He tossed the cup with her order scribbled on it back to Muri, who caught it without looking up from the other coffee she was working on. The customer nodded, mumbled a thanks, and slunk off to the side to wait.

Joel was still refusing to come to the front, and Seb scowled, but went back to working. In fact, it was possible he’d never worked faster; within just a few minutes, the line had dwindled, the stack of cups waiting for Muri had grown substantially, and Joel was standing at the counter, hands in his jacket pockets, smiling shyly.

“Hey,” he said, his cheeks tinged with pink.

“Hey.” Seb reached to grab the front of Joel’s jacket, pulling him in for a kiss over the counter.

Joel kissed him back briefly, then yanked away, looking a little horrified. “Oh my god, Seb, you’re  _ working _ .”

Yeah, whoops, that was a little embarrassing, and more than a little unprofessional. But Seb couldn’t find it in him to care. He shrugged, smiling happily. “Hey, if you didn’t want to get kissed, you shouldn’t have worn your kissing jacket. I don’t make the rules.”

Joel looked amused. “My kissing jacket? Is that what this is?” Seb nodded solemnly in response. Joel grinned. “Cool.”

Someone standing in line behind Joel cleared his throat loudly, and both of them turned to glare at him for a moment before looking back at each other with matching surprised smiles. Seb was glad he wasn’t the only one fed up with impatient customers interfering with their heartfelt reunion.

It really wasn’t a great idea to piss off  _ all _ his customers, though, so Seb turned around. “Muri, switch me?”

Muri looked back and forth between Seb and Joel a couple times, her eyes narrowed. Finally her gaze landed on Seb, but she was pointing to Joel. “Gel?” she asked, and Seb nodded excitedly, ignoring Joel’s indignant expression. Muri looked back to Joel and nodded once. “Nice.” She stepped up to take Seb’s place at the counter, and Seb sidled over, beckoning Joel to follow.

“Why does your  _ coworker _ know about the Gel thing?” Joel complained while Seb got to work.

Seb shrugged as he picked up the next cup from the stack to start that order. “She saw your name in my phone.”

“I’m  _ Gel _ in your phone? Seriously? After you saw what you used to be in mine?”

“I thought it was funny. I-- Wait.” Seb froze mid-pour. “What do you mean,  _ used to be _ ? You  _ changed _ it?”

“Uh, yes?” Joel said, the look on his face saying that that had been the obvious, logical move.

Seb frowned, but finished off the coffee and handed it to a grumpy-looking customer. “Joel, if I had feelings, that would hurt them. Look what you are in my phone.” He pulled out his phone and quickly swiped it open to Joel’s contact, then slid it across the counter to Joel and started on the next order.

“’We Are Dating’?” Joel read off. Seb glanced up at him, feeling his face heat up when Joel laughed quietly. “I like it.” He slid the phone back to Seb and shoved his hands into his pockets. “I can change yours back, if you want.”

“Don’t say anything you don’t mean,” Seb sniffed.

Joel rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone, tapping something on it while Seb finished the second coffee. After he handed that one over, Joel leaned over to show the screen of his phone to Seb.

_ Seb (Hot Coffee Shop Owner I’m Dating) _

Seb nodded approvingly. “Better.”

Joel smiled and slipped his phone back into his pocket. “Anyway, I’ve got to run to work--”

“What? You just got here,” Seb interrupted, pouting. He dropped the customer’s cup he’d just picked up and grabbed a fresh grande cup to start making a caramelized honey latte for Joel.

“You didn’t let me finish! I’ve got to run to work,  _ but _ I wanted to see if you’re free tomorrow night.” Joel was looking down at his shoes, a slight blush across his cheeks.

Seb resisted the urge to agree immediately, instead leaning across the counter until Joel looked back up at him. “For you? Definitely,” he said with a wink. Joel’s blush deepened considerably, and Seb grinned.

“Well, cool,” Joel mumbled, looking down again and rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s my first night off this week. We should hang out. Uh, go out. I’ll text you later.”

Seb nodded. “Sounds good. Although I feel obligated to point out that if you’d cut in line like I  _ told _ you to, we could’ve talked for more than two seconds.” Joel was trying to hand him some money, which he waved away. He held the finished coffee out but retracted it when Joel reached for it. “Can I have another kiss?”

“Absolutely not.”

“But the kissing jacket!”

Joel rolled his eyes. “I’ll wear it again tomorrow,” he promised.

Seb huffed, but handed the coffee over. The next person waiting for their order to be finished approached, looking angry. “Hey--” he began, but Seb cut him off, fully exasperated.

“I am the owner of this establishment,” he said, and raised his voice so everyone could hear, “and I swear to god, the next person to complain about this man getting special treatment will be banned for life.”

The whole shop quieted. Joel looked completely mortified, having turned a deep shade of crimson. “Thanks, bye,” he mumbled quickly before practically running out of the shop.

Muri was staring at Seb. Without a word, and without taking her eyes off Seb, she handed a slack-jawed customer a receipt.

***

  
  


_ Incoming call from: Gel (We Are Dating) _

Seb was surprised to be getting a call from Joel later that day rather than a text. He motioned to Muri that he had to step out and slipped back into the stockroom to answer it.

“Joel?”

“Seb. Hey,” came Joel’s slightly distorted voice. “I’m such an idiot. I forgot that I asked for tomorrow night off so I could take my sister and her friend stargazing for their astronomy class.”

Seb frowned. “The friend who came into the shop with you that one time?”

“That’s the one.”

“Milo?”

“Lila.”

“Right. So, are you calling to cancel, or to beg me to come with you?”

Joel scoffed loudly, which made a weird crackling sound over the phone, and Seb had to move it away from his ear briefly before putting it back in time to hear what Joel was saying. “--wasn’t going to  _ beg _ . I was just going to ask which you’d rather do: raincheck till my next night off, or suffer through a night of Lila being rude at my and Pem’s expense. Probably yours, too.”

“I choose suffering. Easy.”

“Are you sure? It’s not much of a date.”

“Joel, are you kidding? On our last date you took me on a moonlit stroll, gave me your jacket, and kissed me in a park. Now you’re taking me stargazing. You are a fucking master of romance.”

“Oh my god,  _ please _ stop.” Seb could practically feel the heat emanating from Joel’s face through the phone.

Seb snickered. “ _ Now _ you beg. But you’re right. I’ll save it for tomorrow night, when I can see you blush.”

“I don’t blush.”

“Like hell you don’t. So, okay, what’s the plan for tomorrow then?”

“I get off work at eight, then Pem and I are heading to Lila’s house to get her and borrow her mom’s car. We can come pick you up after that.”

Seb shook his head furiously, as if Joel could see. “Not a chance. I’m driving.”

“What? You don’t--”

“Nope. I’m not interested in riding in some hippie-ass minivan. I’ll pick you up from work, we’ll stop by your place for your sister, and then I  _ guess _ we can get Lila after that. Much better plan.”

“Seb…” Joel started, but couldn’t seem to think of an argument, and Seb grinned.

“You  _ know _ it’s a better plan.”

Joel heaved a sigh. “Fine. I’ll see you at eight then.”

“Sounds good. And Joel?”

“Yeah?”

Seb paused.  _ Can’t wait to see you _ ?  _ Can’t wait to kiss your fucking face off _ ? “You totally blush.”

Joel hung up.

  
  


***

  
  


Seb pulled up outside the theater just as Joel was walking out the doors. Joel grinned and waved when he saw him, and Seb’s heart skipped a beat.

“Hey,” Joel said as he slid into the car. The tray of half-finished pepperoni pizza in his hands immediately made the whole car smell greasy, and Seb wrinkled his nose.

“Disgusting.”

Joel shrugged. “If you really think so, I won’t kiss you right now, then.” He lifted the pizza to take another bite, but Seb quickly put a hand on his cheek and turned his head so he could kiss him first. The taste of fake cheese and processed meat was on Joel’s lips, and it  _ was _ disgusting, but Seb was willing to sacrifice sometimes for the greater good.

When they reached Joel's apartment door Seb shot Joel a sly look, but Joel pointedly looked away, blushing, and Seb knew that he, too, was thinking about the other night, when Seb had walked him to the door and he'd pushed Seb up against it and kissed him until someone walking by had whistled at them, and he'd pulled back with his hair messy and his eyes wide and his lips slightly swollen, and he'd smiled and kissed Seb again.

Now Joel fumbled with his keys, still a little pink in the face. “It's not as nice as your place,” he said, sounding almost apologetic, as he unlocked the door.

Seb shook his head. “Who cares. I'm just excited to get to see what goes on on the  _ other _ side of this door,” he said with emphasis, succeeding in bringing Joel's blush back in full force.

The door opened on a small apartment with faded wallpaper and second-hand furniture. When Seb stepped inside it only took him a couple of seconds to observe the entire living room and kitchen. It was modest, but looked well-kept and homey, and Seb found himself a little embarrassed by his own extravagant apartment.

“So, uh, this is it,” Joel said, gesturing around. “You can sit down if you want. I’m just gonna go change and get Pem.”

Seb caught Joel’s hand before he could walk away. “I like it,” he said, giving Joel a quick kiss. Joel smiled a little and hurried down the one short hallway in the apartment, closing a door behind him.

Seb took a seat on the only couch in the front room and looked around at his surroundings again. The walls were spotted with pictures, some hanging in frames, others just taped to the wallpaper. Most looked like family photos.

He was about to stand back up to get a closer look when he heard footsteps coming down the hallway, and after a second a redheaded teenager appeared. She was eating one of those little plastic fruit cups Seb would have eaten as a kid. When she saw him she froze, a peach halfway to her mouth. Slowly she backed up out of sight, and he heard a door open and shut.

“You didn't tell me your boyfriend was already here!” a voice said, loud enough that Seb could hear it easily.  _ Boyfriend _ . He grinned to himself.

There was an equally loud shushing. “Well, now I am,” came Joel's voice. “Seb is here. I'm almost ready, just go out and wait for me with him, will you?”

This time when the girl reappeared in the living room, Seb stood, because it seemed like the polite thing to do. “Pemberly, I presume?” he said, because that also seemed like the polite thing to do, but he immediately regretted it when he heard how stiff it sounded.

Pemberly nodded. “Seb, I presume?” she returned, deadpan.

Seb laughed uncomfortably. “Yeah. Nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

They stood in silence, Pemberly observing Seb while she ate her peaches, and Seb pretending not to notice her watching him.

After a minute he tried for some small talk. “Peaches,” he said awkwardly, pointing to the fruit cup in her hands. “Good shit.”

Pemberly shrugged. “They're okay.”

Luckily Joel reentered the room before Seb could worsen his first impression. He'd changed into a thick flannel shirt and, as promised, his kissing jacket. When he stepped closer Seb noticed he'd put on cologne, too, and smelled amazing.

“Everyone ready to go?” Joel asked, and both Seb and Pemberly nodded. Joel picked up a stack of blankets piled by the door and led Seb out, leaving Pemberly to lock up behind them.

Once they got into Seb’s car, with Joel in shotgun and his sister behind him, Pemberly gave Seb directions to Lila’s house. When they arrived she went to get Lila at the door, and Joel turned to Seb, a very serious expression on his face. “Last chance to back out,” he said darkly.

Seb just laughed. “I’m not going anywhere,” he promised, and leaned over to kiss Joel.

When Pemberly returned to the car with Lila, the first thing Seb heard after the door opening was Lila saying, “--really isn’t your color, you know. You look like a vampire in a pumpkin, and not in a sexy way.”

Seb frowned and looked in the rearview mirror at Pemberly. Her face was a shade of red to rival her hair, and she was looking down at her hands and tugging at the hem of her orange sweater. Seb switched angles so he could see Lila in the mirror instead, his frown deepening when he saw that she was apparently oblivious to how she’d just insulted the girl who was supposedly her best friend.

Suddenly Lila looked up and met Seb’s eyes in the mirror. She looked surprised, like she somehow hadn’t noticed him there before, but her expression quickly morphed into a sneer as she leaned forward. “So he  _ is _ your boyfriend after all, Joel,” she said mockingly, her eyes still on Seb.

Seb glanced at Joel nervously, unsure how he’d respond to that, but Joel seemed unfazed. “Yeah, he is,” he said coolly, and took Seb’s hand in his.

Seb twisted in his seat to give Lila a smug smirk as her mocking expression fell into something that might have been envy. “Yep. Nice to see you again, Milo.”

Lila’s mouth dropped open indignantly. “It’s  _ Lila _ , asshole,” she corrected him, but there wasn’t much of an edge to it, and she was slouching back into her seat.

Joel looked like he was trying not to grin. “So are we gonna get going or what?”

“If you insist.” Seb brought Joel’s hand up to his lips so he could kiss it before relinquishing his hold and shifting the car into drive.

  
  


***

 

The night was cold, but the blankets beneath and on top of them, as well as the warmth of Joel beside him, made it not only bearable but pleasant for Seb. Pemberly and Lila shared another set of blankets a couple feet away from them. When a gust of chilly air nipped at his cheeks, Seb wiggled even closer to Joel and buried his face in his shoulder, just as Joel lifted the hand that wasn’t holding Seb’s and pointed upwards.

“Hey, I think I see the Big Dipper.”

“Oh, great job, Joel. That’s only the easiest constellation of all time to find.”

Joel scowled, looking like he wanted to snap something back at Lila, but Seb squeezed his hand and cut in before he could. “You want some rare constellations? I’ve got one for you. Boom, Sirius, right there,” he declared, thrusting a finger towards the night sky.

Pemberly hummed in confusion. “No, I think Sirius is actually over there,” she said, pointing in the exact opposite direction.

“Ah. Well, here’s good old Draco.”

“Nope.” Pemberly sat up and pushed at Seb’s arm, redirecting him so he was pointing in the right place.

“Right again. Damn, Peaches, you’re gonna ace this class. Alright, here’s my last rare constellation: Lucius, right over our little heads.”

Pemberly squinted at him. “That’s not even a constellation. You’re just naming characters from Harry Potter, aren’t you?” she accused.

Seb shrugged, his shoulder bumping into Joel’s as he did. “Hey, I never claimed to be an astronomer. I’m just here as a chauffeur and a boyfriend.” Joel nudged his shoulder, and Seb wasn’t sure if it was in return for his bumping shrug, or in response to his saying  _ boyfriend _ . Either way, he couldn’t help grinning.

Lila scoffed. “You’re an idiot,” she said, and promptly launched into a lecture on which constellations actually  _ were _ in Harry Potter, where they were, and what they meant. Pemberly laid back down next to her, looking mesmerized.

Seb, on the other hand, was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to pay attention to her even if he wanted to, because Joel’s hand had let go of his and was now resting on his leg.

Seb rolled over on his side so he was facing Joel, the hand on his leg obligingly moving to settle on the side of his thigh. “Hey,” he said quietly.

Joel stayed on his back, but let his head flop to the side so his face was just a few inches from Seb’s. “Hey,” he murmured back, smiling a little. His brown eyes bore into Seb’s questioningly, probably waiting to see if Seb was going to say something else, but Seb found he didn't have anything to follow up with. Possibly because Joel's thumb was now rubbing his thigh in a very distracting way.

So instead of speaking, Seb drew a hitching breath and moved his own hand to rest on Joel's stomach. He started to mimic Joel's thumb movements, rubbing gentle circles into the flannel of Joel's shirt, and Joel closed his eyes and let out a small, seemingly involuntary hum.

Oh, god. Did Joel have any idea how attractive he was? Here, with his hair mussed from lying on the ground and his eyes closed, and his flannel shirt and his kissing jacket, he looked like a guy Abercrombie & Fitch would call in for a modeling audition, only to immediately rule him out when they realized how difficult he was to work with.

Seb almost snorted at the thought, but instead he propped himself up on an elbow and leaned in close to Joel. “Hey,” he said again.

Joel opened one eye. “Hey,” he replied, again, looking like he couldn't decide if he should be irritated or amused.

“You're really fucking hot. Just wanted to tell you that,” Seb said casually. He patted Joel's stomach twice and started to move back, but Joel quickly removed his hand from Seb’s leg and slid it between his side and his arm where he was propping himself up.

“Not so fast,” Joel growled, and he wrapped his arm around Seb and pulled him closer until he was half on top of him.

Seb laughed into Joel's armpit, where his face had ended up being pressed. “Damn, if I'd known that was all it took to get on top of you, I would've told you that the first time I saw you.”

Joel scoffed, but didn't say anything, just tightened the arm around Seb’s waist. His fingers trailed along Seb’s hip, and Seb shivered a little when they grazed a sliver of exposed skin where his shirt has pulled up.

Apparently this did not escape Joel's notice, because he immediately slipped his thumb under the hem of Seb’s shirt to stroke unhindered at the skin of his waist. Seb bit back a sigh, because Pemberly and Lila were still there just inches away from them, and things would probably get awkward real fast if he started making what could be construed as sex noises while under blankets with Pemberly’s older brother.

Seb pressed his face harder into Joel's shoulder, breathing in his cologne and the faint scent of popcorn as he tried not to make any noise. But that was difficult, because now Joel's whole hand was under his shirt, moving slowly across his lower back, and it felt fucking  _ amazing _ .

He decided that if  _ he _ had to suffer through this hardship, then so should Joel. He wasted no time in sliding his own hand underneath Joel's shirt to land on his stomach, and Joel temporarily tensed, pausing in his motions and squeezing Seb a little tighter to him.

Satisfied, Seb slid his hand farther up the front of Joel's shirt, and Joel responded by doing the same up the back of Seb’s. “Fuck, Seb,” he said, so quietly Seb could barely hear it.

“You started it,” he murmured in return. Joel hummed his concession, and resumed his slow stroking of Seb’s back.

They stayed that way for a long time. Seb’s leg was starting to fall asleep where it was hooked over Joel's, but he didn't dare move and break the electric tension between their bodies.

Eventually Pemberly and Lila’s quiet talking died down, and he heard a shuffling nearby. “I think they're asleep,” Pemberly’s voice said softly from somewhere above him.

Lila huffed. “Figures. Come on, Pem, let's go for a walk, I'm  _ bored _ .”

“Okay,” said Pemberly, sounding happy. There was more shuffling as the girls stood up, and Seb could hear their footsteps fading away.

He waited a couple more minutes before speaking. “Joel,” he whispered. “Are you asleep?”

Joel shifted a bit beneath him and gave a quiet, breathless laugh. “How could I be?”

Seb wasn't sure if it was his doing, or Joel's, or a combined effort, but he was suddenly fully on top of Joel, their mouths colliding roughly. The hand that wasn't under Joel's shirt and trapped between their chests went to twist into Joel's hair, cushioning the back of Joel’s head from the thinly blanketed ground so that Seb could kiss him so hard he thought his hand might bruise from being pressed into the ground.

Joel's hand pushed its way all the way up the back of Seb’s shirt until it emerged from the collar and tangled itself in Seb’s hair, too, while his other hand slid to take the first’s place on Seb’s lower back. Seb finally let out the quiet moan he’d been holding onto for the past fifteen minutes, making Joel laugh softly against his mouth, and he decided he needed to get an equal or greater reaction out of Joel as soon as possible.

His shirt had pulled up a good few inches when Joel’s hand went through; Seb tugged his hand out from under Joel’s shirt and grasped the hem of it, pushing it up over Joel’s navel so that their bare stomachs were pressed together, and he slid his hand to curve around the side of Joel’s waist. Joel sighed a little bit, which was nice, but not quite enough to call it even.

Seb moved his mouth away from Joel’s and onto his jaw, chuckling at Joel’s tiny noise of frustration. He brushed his lips slowly up to Joel’s ear and kissed softly up and around it. He paused when he came full circle, listening to Joel’s erratic breathing for a moment, before pulling Joel’s earlobe into his mouth. Joel drew a sharp breath, and the tips of his fingers pressed harder into Seb’s back.

“Oh my god, Seb,” Joel breathed as Seb ran his tongue along the side of Joel’s earlobe and scraped his teeth against it gently.

Seb grinned into the hollow behind Joel’s ear. That was more like it, but he could do better.

He trailed slow wet kisses down Joel’s neck, noting with satisfaction that it was moving with heavy, irregular breaths. He carefully extracted his hand from Joel’s hair and moved it down to the top button of Joel’s shirt, which he deftly undid. When he reached Joel’s collar he tugged it down and to the side so there were a couple extra inches of exposed skin, which he immediately began to suck on.

Joel’s hands were now on Seb’s hips, fingers tensing and relaxing in time with the heaving of his chest. Finally, he moaned: “ _ God _ , Seb.”

After a moment Seb pulled back to admire his handiwork--Joel would have a pret-ty nice hickey to have to explain to Pemberly--and to smirk at Joel. He brought his face close to Joel’s again, so the tips of their noses were touching. “You know,” he murmured, “there’s no need to call me by my full name. Just ‘god’ or ‘Seb’ is fine.”

Joel gave Seb an eyeroll that put all his previous ones to shame. “Unbelievable,” he muttered, before tilting his head up to kiss Seb again with renewed ferocity.

When Joel bit at his lip Seb gasped, and Joel took advantage of his temporary stunned pause to flip over so that Seb was on his back on the ground and he was leaning over him, one arm on the ground supporting him, the other still around Seb’s waist.

“We should...stop. Probably,” Joel said breathlessly, even as his fingers twisted into Seb’s belt loops and his knee pushed its way between Seb’s. “Girls could get back any minute.”

Seb chuckled into the crook of Joel’s neck. “What, you don’t think they’ve seen two dudes fucking under the stars before?” he joked.

Before he even knew what was happening Joel was off of him and sitting up a couple feet away and he was being crushed by the cold night air that rushed in to replace Joel’s heat.

It took him a second to pull himself up into a sitting position and look over at Joel questioningly. “What--”

“We weren’t  _ fucking _ ,” Joel said flatly, his face taut, eyes looking off to the side instead of at Seb.

Seb’s brow furrowed in confusion. “I was just--”

“We were not. Fucking.  _ Fucking _ .”

Any other time Seb would have laughed at the confusing repeated word, but now he just squinted at Joel, irritated. “What’s your damage? I was just making a joke.”

“Not funny.”

Seb threw his hands in the air. “Sorry I’m not your favorite comedian, then. I was just saying, if Peaches and Milo  _ happened _ to come back right then, it would’ve looked an  _ awful lot  _ like we were fucking. And to be honest, it didn’t  _ feel _ that far off and innocent or whatever, either. But it’s great to know the idea of fucking me is so abhorrent to you. Really great. I’ll keep that in mind.”

He stood then and sauntered away, ignoring when Joel huffed and called, “That’s not what I  _ meant _ .” He rolled his eyes, even though Joel couldn’t see.

_ What a dick _ , he thought sullenly as he walked, peeking behind him a couple times to see if Joel was following after him. (He wasn’t.) Even after their conversation outside the coffee shop, even after the kiss in the park, after everything, Seb still didn’t know what Joel wanted from him. Sure, he’d as good as told Lila that Seb was his boyfriend, but was that just like, a situational thing? A nice convenient “fuck you” to Lila?

He started planning out what he’d say to Joel when he went back.  _ First of all, how dare you _ \-- No.  _ I don’t want to have sex with you either _ \-- Nope.  _ Let’s just kiss and make out-- make up-- _ Even if he  _ wanted _ to say that one, there’s no way he could get through it without screwing it up.

With a huge sigh, Seb kicked at the ground. How far had he walked? It was probably time to turn back, even if he hadn’t thought of the perfect line yet. Reluctantly, he slowed and started to turn, but stopped short when he saw a figure under a nearby tree. He stepped closer, peering at the figure. Had Pemberly and Lila gotten separated?

As he approached he saw that it wasn’t one figure, but two; he could see a short mop of red hair peeking out above blonde curls, and Seb realized that it was both Pemberly  _ and _ Lila, and Lila had Pemberly pressed up against the tree, and they were  _ kissing _ .

Seb couldn’t stop himself from gasping out loud. The girls immediately broke apart, and Lila whirled around, an absolutely murderous look on her face. Pem just looked dazed.

“What the hell?” Lila yelled, then turned and focused her rage on Pemberly. “You could’ve warned me that your brother’s new boyfriend was a fucking pervert.”

“I-- he--” Pemberly stammered, and Lila gave her a disparaging look before turning up her nose and stalking away.

Pem was frozen, and Seb thought those might be tears in her eyes. Hesitantly he stepped towards her and went to put a hand on her shoulder. “Shit, Peaches, I didn’t mean to--”

“Fuck off!” she said angrily, shoving his hand away and glaring at him--okay, yeah, those were  _ definitely _ tears in her eyes, fuck--and before he could say anything else she was running after Lila.

Seb stood still for a long minute, completely thrown for a loop. First of all, he’d had no idea Pemberly liked girls, and his gaydar was usually so good. And second of all, he didn’t have much personal experience with Lila, but from the experience he  _ did _ have (as well as Joel’s fervent testimony), he was pretty sure she was the most godawful person on the planet. There was no way Joel approved--

A surprised but pleased smile spread across his face. There was  _ definitely _ no way Joel would approve, so if it was happening, that must mean that  _ Joel didn’t know _ . And he’d get to be the one to tell him.

He practically ran back to where the others were folding up the blankets, everybody very clearly through with the night. Pemberly and Lila were pointedly not looking at one another. Joel glanced up at the sound of Seb’s footsteps, but quickly looked away, his mouth a thin line.

Seb rolled his eyes at all of them, but joined in packing up. When he ended up near Joel he whispered, “Hey, Joel.” Joel looked up at him, his expression wary--probably still on edge from their fight, which Seb had all but forgotten in light of this new development--but he raised his eyebrows. “I know a secret,” Seb continued in his whisper.

“No, you don’t,” Lila snapped, startling Seb. He hadn’t realized the others could hear him. Both of the girls looked like they might strangle him if he didn’t drop it.

So he shrugged. “You’re right. I don’t.” When they turned their attention away from him again, he looked back at Joel and winked. “ _ I do _ ,” he mouthed, and Joel gave in and grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have no idea how to write makeout scenes sorry hopefully this wasn't too gross hahaha


End file.
